{"id":11590,"date":"2025-11-02T10:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-11-02T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/?p=11590"},"modified":"2025-11-13T06:42:47","modified_gmt":"2025-11-13T11:42:47","slug":"the-imperfectionist","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/the-imperfectionist\/","title":{"rendered":"The Imperfectionist"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>I have a secret: I&#8217;m not perfect. I&#8217;ve stopped trying to be. Why am I telling you this? Isn&#8217;t a blog post supposed to help you become a little more perfect? Not this one. This is about giving up the constant struggle for perfection, and in doing so, leading a better life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.oliverburkeman.com\/the-imperfectionist\">The Imperfectionist<\/a> is the title of Oliver Burkeman&#8217;s blog. These essays are compiled into his book <a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Meditations-Mortals-Embrace-Limitations-Counts\/dp\/B0CW47NDT6\/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.7FkSECtBKLwxnqq6nvPlENgiluc837Pq_PajiUZBRJzamDBp82oEEbqiIp7qLGdA6laRAfXWpUXfgyhKQ2con3zOiyhP5mYwru3CBxd7H-7sk_HH5P9KPYjrxE0gyTGjTJ0gU1RSHM4K2R9Baz5TPfvxTDR3HkQ69IAQnvpnK5Iz-QNA14Y0QeDkfq6qmNOQUT32wkFBW50FBur5ljQnncu2-ZggPR1odT39AgzUGNE.MNxnSs0yZZDRkzhVB5VybztwTNDW48pJaj3ldULCafk&amp;dib_tag=se&amp;hvadid=705531905175&amp;hvdev=c&amp;hvexpln=0&amp;hvlocphy=9073479&amp;hvnetw=g&amp;hvocijid=12708035905734231836--&amp;hvqmt=e&amp;hvrand=12708035905734231836&amp;hvtargid=kwd-2270237421835&amp;hydadcr=20586_13321904&amp;keywords=meditations+for+mortals&amp;mcid=6fcc9d679169378ea58917a05a90c611&amp;qid=1761959775&amp;sr=8-1\">Meditations for Mortals<\/a>, which I thoroughly enjoyed. The title sounds simple, but it has a very British double meaning. I originally thought the word &#8220;mortals&#8221; was referring to ordinary people, but it also refers to the finitude of life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;d been searching for a book of daily meditations\u2014something that could set my day off on the right note. This one has truths I&#8217;d always sensed but couldn&#8217;t name. I&#8217;ve read the whole thing back to front 3 or 4 times this year, for 10 minutes each day while my tea steeps and the house is still silent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Before this, he wrote columns for <em>The Guardian<\/em> about productivity, convinced that if he just found the right system, he&#8217;d finally get everything done. But each trick only bred more tasks\u2014the emptier his inbox, the faster it refilled. Doing more didn&#8217;t bring calm; it just changed the game of whack-a-mole. Eventually he saw that the goal wasn&#8217;t to finish his infinite list but to change the way he thought about it. His solution: treat your to-do list like a river, not a bucket\u2014something that flows endlessly past you, from which you can dip a few meaningful things, and let the rest drift on by.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The book draws on wisdom from across centuries\u2014Stoics, Buddhists, existentialists, and even comedians\u2014and packages it all in clear, modern language. It answers many of the key questions of life like:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>What should I do with my life?<\/strong> Carl Jung says: discover your life task\u2014the thing your deeper self is already moving toward. You don&#8217;t choose it; you uncover it. The work isn&#8217;t to decide what to become, but to listen closely enough to become what you already are.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>How do I keep from feeling overwhelmed?<\/strong> Create a done list. Instead of staring at what&#8217;s unfinished, notice what you&#8217;ve already done. It&#8217;s as simple as not deleting the items on your to-do list once they&#8217;re completed.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>What if my life could&#8217;ve turned out better?<\/strong> Maybe it could have\u2014but then it wouldn&#8217;t have been yours. Simone de Beauvoir marveled that out of hundreds of millions of chances, one sperm met one egg and became her. Change even a tiny detail, and you disappear.<sup data-fn=\"3ca11a35-ca92-484c-b9f1-1e9a8fb88914\" class=\"fn\"><a href=\"#3ca11a35-ca92-484c-b9f1-1e9a8fb88914\" id=\"3ca11a35-ca92-484c-b9f1-1e9a8fb88914-link\">1<\/a><\/sup><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>What should I do when I feel completely lost?<\/strong> As comedian Mitch Hedberg put it: &#8220;If you find yourself lost in the woods, fuck it, build a house.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Burkeman even has BBC radio shows exploring these ideas further. I particularly enjoyed <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bbc.co.uk\/programmes\/m001mbz1\/episodes\/player\">An Inconvenient Truth<\/a>,<sup data-fn=\"526a91a1-493e-4d55-be5c-0fc8777137f8\" class=\"fn\"><a href=\"#526a91a1-493e-4d55-be5c-0fc8777137f8\" id=\"526a91a1-493e-4d55-be5c-0fc8777137f8-link\">2<\/a><\/sup> where he argues that convenience culture is a bit of a fraud. Companies try to convince us we need their products to remove life&#8217;s inconveniences. He uses the example of a hypothetical baby care app that raises your child without any hassle. Would anyone actually want that? Of course not\u2014because inconvenience is where life is lived.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Each morning, as my tea steeps, I still listen to one meditation and let it settle. I still make mistakes\u2014I get frustrated, I leave tasks undone, I make mistakes. But now I see those things differently. They&#8217;re not failures. They&#8217;re just life as a mortal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Note:<\/strong> Much of Burkeman&#8217;s work is available for free on Spotify and\/or the BBC.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Footnotes<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-footnotes\"><li id=\"3ca11a35-ca92-484c-b9f1-1e9a8fb88914\">This one is from Burkeman&#8217;s book 4000 weeks. <a href=\"#3ca11a35-ca92-484c-b9f1-1e9a8fb88914-link\" aria-label=\"Jump to footnote reference 1\">\u21a9\ufe0e<\/a><\/li><li id=\"526a91a1-493e-4d55-be5c-0fc8777137f8\">Note that you have to listen to these from the bottom up because the most recent episodes are on top. <a href=\"#526a91a1-493e-4d55-be5c-0fc8777137f8-link\" aria-label=\"Jump to footnote reference 2\">\u21a9\ufe0e<\/a><\/li><\/ol>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have a secret: I&#8217;m not perfect. I&#8217;ve stopped trying to be. Why am I telling you this? Isn&#8217;t a blog post supposed to help you become a little more perfect? Not this one. This is about giving up the constant struggle for perfection, and in doing so, leading a better life. The Imperfectionist is [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"[{\"content\":\"This one is from Burkeman's book 4000 weeks.\",\"id\":\"3ca11a35-ca92-484c-b9f1-1e9a8fb88914\"},{\"content\":\"Note that you have to listen to these from the bottom up because the most recent episodes are on top.\",\"id\":\"526a91a1-493e-4d55-be5c-0fc8777137f8\"}]","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4,7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11590","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life-management","category-meditation"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8wCkz-30W","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4274,"url":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/are-more-choices-good-or-bad\/","url_meta":{"origin":11590,"position":0},"title":"Are More Choices Good or Bad?","author":"Robert Schlaff","date":"May 18, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"I've been following some of the recent research on how people make choices. The following summary represents two sides of an argument on whether or not more choice is a good or bad thing. In actuality, Malcolm Gladwell\u2019s point of view is actually the standard thinking -- that more choice\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Product Management&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Product Management","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/category\/product-management\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/07\/nyc050315c.gif?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3079,"url":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/tell-me-about-a-time-you-made-a-mistake-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":11590,"position":1},"title":"Tell Me About a Time You Made a Mistake","author":"Robert Schlaff","date":"April 23, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"This is one of the scariest interview questions. In an interview, you always want to show yourself in the best light. You want to show how perfect you are. But here's a secret. Interviewers know that you're not perfect, and that's OK. It's more important that you learn from your\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Life Lessons&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Life Lessons","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/category\/life-management\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/DLYyqQ_W0AEGF1k.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/DLYyqQ_W0AEGF1k.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/DLYyqQ_W0AEGF1k.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":9640,"url":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/our-summer-camp-getaway-at-mohonk-mountain-house\/","url_meta":{"origin":11590,"position":2},"title":"Our Summer Camp Getaway at Mohonk Mountain House","author":"Robert Schlaff","date":"July 28, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"While the kids were at camp for the summer, Abigail and I decided to set off on our own version of summer camp for a weekend at the Mohonk Mountain House. Built in 1869, Mohonk Mountain House is a grand old lodge in upstate New York. It\u2019s a place full\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adventures&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adventures","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/category\/adventures\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/IMG_1608-1.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/IMG_1608-1.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/IMG_1608-1.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/IMG_1608-1.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/IMG_1608-1.jpeg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4302,"url":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/making-the-most-of-this-ugly-year\/","url_meta":{"origin":11590,"position":3},"title":"Making the Most of This Ugly Year","author":"Robert Schlaff","date":"November 28, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. \u2014 The opening line to Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy. Ziba's Holiday Gift 2009. Featuring Ugly. I still have a holiday gift I got in December of 2009 from the design firm Ziba. They created six\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;COVID&quot;","block_context":{"text":"COVID","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/category\/covid\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/IMG_5863-scaled.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/IMG_5863-scaled.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/IMG_5863-scaled.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/IMG_5863-scaled.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/IMG_5863-scaled.jpeg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/12\/IMG_5863-scaled.jpeg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":8965,"url":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/a-meditation-on-skiing\/","url_meta":{"origin":11590,"position":4},"title":"A Meditation on Skiing","author":"Robert Schlaff","date":"February 25, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"We just got back from a skiing vacation. Skiing is a bit of a non-intuitive vacation. Why would a person want to spend their hard-earned money and vacation time in a cold, physically punishing environment? For the challenge. The challenge in skiing is commonly thought to be pushing your body\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adventures&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adventures","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/category\/adventures\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/DALL%C2%B7E-2024-02-25-15.40.37-A-tranquil-scene-depicting-a-male-skier-in-a-1_4-view-pausing-on-a-snowy-mountain-slope.-He-is-almost-fully-facing-the-mountain-with-his-back-slight.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/DALL%C2%B7E-2024-02-25-15.40.37-A-tranquil-scene-depicting-a-male-skier-in-a-1_4-view-pausing-on-a-snowy-mountain-slope.-He-is-almost-fully-facing-the-mountain-with-his-back-slight.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/DALL%C2%B7E-2024-02-25-15.40.37-A-tranquil-scene-depicting-a-male-skier-in-a-1_4-view-pausing-on-a-snowy-mountain-slope.-He-is-almost-fully-facing-the-mountain-with-his-back-slight.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/DALL%C2%B7E-2024-02-25-15.40.37-A-tranquil-scene-depicting-a-male-skier-in-a-1_4-view-pausing-on-a-snowy-mountain-slope.-He-is-almost-fully-facing-the-mountain-with-his-back-slight.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":9507,"url":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/chatgpt-memes-that-show-ais-quirky-side\/","url_meta":{"origin":11590,"position":5},"title":"ChatGPT Memes That Show AI&#8217;s Quirky Side","author":"Robert Schlaff","date":"July 4, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"I found some funny ChatGPT memes on Bored Panda that I wanted to share. All of the text and commentary are generated by ChatGPT based on the uploaded images. It's pretty amazing that it can read and interpret the images as well as provide sensible commentary. The only prompt I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;ChatGPT&quot;","block_context":{"text":"ChatGPT","link":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/category\/chatgpt\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/6502ab6004549_nwiqr5r0ns1b1__700.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/6502ab6004549_nwiqr5r0ns1b1__700.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/6502ab6004549_nwiqr5r0ns1b1__700.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/6502ab6004549_nwiqr5r0ns1b1__700.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11590","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11590"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11590\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11594,"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11590\/revisions\/11594"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11590"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11590"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/schlaff.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11590"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}