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How Elon Musk Paid Off My Friend’s Mortgage

On November 14, 2024, The Onion announced a move that felt straight out of its own pages: it acquired Infowars, during a bankruptcy auction. This surprising twist came after Infowars’ downfall following defamation lawsuits won by families of the Sandy Hook victims. The Onion plans to relaunch Infowars in January 2025 as a parody site—a poetic, and perhaps ironic, reclamation of a space once dominated by misinformation.

For most people, this unexpected merger would qualify as the highlight of their week. But then my friend Chopra texted me.

Chopra, a lifelong humorist, has always had an uncanny ability to spot the absurdities of the world and turn them into punchlines. In 2013, he stumbled upon Dogecoin, a cryptocurrency inspired by the bewildered Shiba Inu meme, and couldn’t resist the comedic potential. To him, the idea of a digital currency based on a dog meme was the ultimate joke—a joke you could buy coffee with. Naturally, he bought in, snagging Dogecoin at just 0.2 cents per coin. For Chopra, this wasn’t an investment; it was a way to turn a joke into a story to tell at parties.

Years later, the punchline got a twist no one expected. Dogecoin—Chopra’s “dog money”—began to rise in value, helped along by internet hype and, most dramatically, Elon Musk. Musk, a billionaire with a flair for meme culture and internet antics, embraced Dogecoin as “the people’s crypto,” turning it into a global sensation. His tweets sent the cryptocurrency soaring overnight, transforming what Chopra once considered a novelty into a bona fide financial asset.

But the story didn’t end there. In November 2024, Musk was appointed co-leader of the newly formed Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE)—a nod to the cryptocurrency he championed. The initiative, spearheaded by President-elect Donald Trump, aimed to streamline federal bureaucracy, though its acronym felt more like a calculated wink to Musk’s fans. Almost immediately, Dogecoin’s value skyrocketed, surging from 16 cents to over 43 cents in a matter of days, fueled by the overlap between government buzz and Musk’s enduring influence over meme-driven markets.

For Chopra, this whirlwind brought him to a bittersweet decision. Selling his Dogecoin felt like letting go of a long-running gag, but now we were talking about real money. Letting go of his Dogecoin, Chopra used the money to pay off his mortgage. That he could pay off his mortgage with a cryptocurrency inspired by a Shiba Inu meme was far more amusing—and satisfying—than simply holding onto the coins as a quirky keepsake.

And that’s how Chopra bought his DOGE house.